Thursday, August 7, 2008

This morning

...I'm feeling a little off again - not horrible, just a little off my game.

I've noticed that I stopped caring about what I put in my mouth again. Okay, boy can that be misread. By "what I put in my mouth" I'm referring to food. See, when I was pregnant, I was able to eat super healthy - and had no problem doing so. I didn't get to the point where I craved sweets or anything bad. In fact, I very rarely had sweets because I just didn't want it. Instead, I ate really balanced meals and kept everything super healthy and didn't overindulge. It was perfect - and it was something I should have done a long time ago.

But now I'm back to not caring; now I'm back to eating whatever the fuck I want to. Yesterday, for example, I had a McDonald's Sausage Biscuit meal with and iced coffee for breakfast; a BBQ beef sandwich, fries and a regular coke for lunch; and a grilled cheese and potato chips for dinner. WTF is that? That's like what a 10 year old would eat!

My husband's not too thrilled with my need for coffee again. As soon as I got pregnant, I stopped the caffeine just like that... I didn't even suffer from any withdrawal headaches or anything. And now I'm back to getting my morning cup of iced coffee and the only reason I get it is cuz I can.

Yeah so I think my issues with food is why I'm feeling off this morning. So now that I'm owning it, I'm hoping to change it. No, I *will* change it. While I do have an iced coffee right now, my lunch is a ham sandwich on wheat with pretzels and olives that I packed from home. I wanted to lose weight before I got pregnant last time and didn't so here's my chance to do it before the next time I get knocked up.

And speaking of getting knocked up... I cannot wait to have sex again! It's been nearly two months since we've last done the deed and dear lord do I *need* to get laid. Before leaving this morning, I laid on Stephen to give him kissed goodbye (he's still in bed when I leave) and told him how I wanted to do him right then and there; he agreed. But I was fully dressed and had to get going to work... Fucking work.

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